Being alone - the road to acceptance

Not to be confused with being lonely, being alone is an opportunity to learn acceptance, to experience the deepest meaning that the universe has to offer.

Paradoxically, my greatest joys have come from "being together". However, it is my ability to be alone that provides the depth and dimension to that experience.

This phenomenon could not be more true when it comes to fighting illness. But it is also true of other events signifying loss. When something major happens to you - like cancer - you know you are fundamentally alone. Not even the medical experts can make you feel otherwise. It's a very personal battle. And when you come to terms with it, you come to terms with it alone. You make your resolutions alone. Everything else is just noise. Even if you believe in a higher power, it is your own decision to take that guidance - and you decide that alone.

I have been observing other cancer patients during my several visits to Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital. In this place, thousands of cancer patients and their families come and go. They come from every far corner of the world. Some are angry and bitter. Others are bright-eyed and seem to light up the room with their smiles. So what makes the difference? In my opinion, those who smile have been able to make their peace, within themselves, regardless of the external world and those around them - they have stood alone and accepted themselves.

The most fundamental of all acceptances is the acceptance of self. What a wonderful gift that is. For how can you accept anyone else if you don't accept yourself first? So if you haven't already, try being alone and see what happens. Get to really know yourself. You'd be surprised at how awesome you truly are. Then, when you look around, you will see how awesome this world really is. Each and every one of us has the potential to light up the world with a smile of acceptance. It's contagious.

And oh my gosh, what could this lead to? Love? Tolerance? Maybe the evening news would even look different someday.